33 times Trump claimed his enemies came to him begging for favors — and HE SAID NO!
Every Donald Trump interview is a phantasmagorical wonderland of narcissism, projection, pointless lies, baseless insults, outlandish fables, baffling ignorance, and misplaced self-assurance.
You can jump into his interviews at any random point and it’ll be like stepping into Willy Wonka’s magical chocolate factory just as Augustus Gloop gets sucked up that chocolate-river tube — it’s at once dazzling, otherworldly, and horrifying.
Indeed, these interviews could be no less weird if Trump, the interviewer, the transcriber, the copy editor, and the reader were all part of the same East Village ayahuasca ceremony.
His recent New York Times interview (why he keeps granting interviews to a fake, failing newspaper is still a mystery) was no exception.
The most eye-popping portions — like when he implied he’d have preferred an attorney general that he could figuratively, not just literally, keep in his back pocket — have been thoroughly parsed already. But nestled deep inside the sticky, septic Chuck E Cheese ball pit that is Trump’s mind was also this gem:
“[Special Counsel Robert Mueller] was up here and he wanted the [FBI] job. Talk about conflicts. But he was interviewing for the job. There were many other conflicts that I haven't said, but I will at some point."
Well, that wouldn’t really be a conflict unless Mueller agreed to take the job and then promised his undying loyalty to the guy he was supposed to be investigating. But it stands out because it points up a personality glitch that Trump has revealed many, many times during his past dealings with the plebeian class. Often, when a mere mortal insults or slights Trump — or simply has the temerity to faithfully fulfill his or her assigned role — Trump claims that person once came to him on bended knee begging for a job or a favor.
This strange and ugly habit reared its head again a few weeks ago when Mika Brzezinski got under Trump’s skin, prompting him to claim she had come to Mar-a-Lago three nights in a row bleeding from her face while begging to get into the club ... because that’s exactly the kind of thing human beings do.
This is an extremely weird character flaw, and Trump has put it on lurid display dozens of times.
Here are just some of those instances (this is by no means a comprehensive list):
“I heard poorly rated @Morning_Joe speaks badly of me (don't watch anymore). Then how come low I.Q. Crazy Mika, along with Psycho Joe, came … to Mar-a-Lago 3 nights in a row around New Year's Eve, and insisted on joining me. She was bleeding badly from a face-lift. I said no!”
“Watched low rated @Morning_Joe for first time in long time. FAKE NEWS. He called me to stop a National Enquirer article. I said no! Bad show”
“Dummy writer @tonyschwartz, who wanted to do a second book with me for years (I said no), is now a hostile basket case who feels jilted!”
“What Barbara Res does not say is that she would call my company endlessly, and for years, trying to come back. I said no.”
“Club For Growth tried to extort $1,000,000 from me. When I said NO, they went hostile with negative ads. Disgraceful!”
“The Club For Growth,which asked me for $1,000,000 in an extortion attempt, just put up a Wisconsin ad with incorrect math.What a dumb group!”
(Club for Growth really got under his bonnet. There are numerous tweets just like these.)
“Great job on @donlemon tonight @kayleighmcenany @cherijacobus begged us for a job. We said no and she went hostile. A real dummy! @CNN”
“@GlennBeck got fired like a dog by #Fox. The Blaze is failing and he wanted to have me on his show. I said no - because he is irrelevant.”
“The only reason irrelevant @GlennBeck doesn't like me is I refused to do his failing show - asked many times. Very few listeners - sad!”
“Jon Huntsman called to see me. I said no, he gave away our country to China! @JonHuntsman”
(Trump recently announced he will nominate Huntsman to be the U.S. ambassador to Russia.)
“The very foul mouthed Sen. John McCain begged for my support during his primary (I gave, he won), then dropped me over locker room remarks!”
“.@bobvanderplaats begged me to do an event while asking organizers for $100,000 for himself—a bad guy!”
“.@bobvanderplaats is a total phony and dishonest guy. Asked me for expensive hotel rooms, free (and more). I said pay and he endorsed Cruz!”
“Wow @UnionLeader circulation in NH has dropped from 75,000 to around 10—bad management. No wonder they begged me for ads.”
“Joe McQuaid (@deucecrew) of the dying Union Leader wanted ads, lunches, donations, speeches from me, and tweets---very unethical.”
“Leightweight @Lord Sugar virtually begged my reps to have me stop mocking him. Every time this dope goes on Apprentice I make money-too easy”
“I let @pennjillette come back on the record 13th season of ‘All Star’ @CelebApprentice after he relentlessly begged me to--good t.v.”
“I loved firing goofball atheist Penn @pennjillette on The Apprentice. He never had a chance. Wrote letter to me begging for forgiveness.”
“Before Star Jones begged me to put her on The Apprentice she was ‘professionally dead.’ I saved her tiny career—now she knocks my offer on the TODAY Show!”
“I was at @FoxNews and met Juan Williams in passing. He asked if he could have pictures taken with me. I said fine. He then trashes on air!”
“.@TheJuanWilliams you never speak well of me & yet when I saw you at Fox you ran over like a child and wanted a picture. Please share pic!”
“When Mitt Romney asked me for my endorsement last time around, he was so awkward and goofy that we all should have known he could not win!”
“The dying @NYDailyNews asked me to do an Editorial on the Central Park 5 ripoff & then they pretend it was my idea. Loser newspaper!”
“Lightweight A.G. Eric Schneiderman asked us for political contributions DURING his investigation of us,then sued for $40 million.Dopey guy!”
“Why did lightweight A.G. Eric Schneiderman come to my office on numerous occasions begging for campaign contributions? Also, recent asks?”
“.@BrentBozell, one of the National Review lightweights, came to my office begging for money like a dog. Why doesn't he say that?”
“The ultra liberal and seriously failing Des Moines Register is BEGGING my team for press credentials to my event in Iowa today-but they lie!”
“.@GovernorPerry in my office last cycle playing nice and begging for my support and money. Hypocrite!”
(Perry is now Trump’s energy secretary.)
“Letterman @Late_Show begging me to go back on his low rated show--calls lots--must apologize for racist comment.”
“.@thehill John Oliver had his people call to ask me to be on his very boring and low rated show. I said ‘NO THANKS’ Waste of time & energy!”
(According to Oliver, Trump was never asked to be on his show — partly, though not primarily, because his show doesn’t feature guests.)
And those are just the tweets. (You can search through all of Trump’s tweets here. It’s pretty easy to find stuff because he uses the same 30 words over and over.)
Trump also released this statement after Seth Meyers banned the then-candidate from his late-night show:
“He has begged me to do the show for the last two years. I have told him emphatically ‘no.’ I only like doing shows with good ratings, which as everybody knows, I only make better (by a lot).”
And, of course, this was Trump’s response to Mitt Romney after Romney gave a wide-ranging speech outlining Trump’s unfitness for office:
“I don't know what happened to him. You can see how loyal he is. He was begging for my endorsement. I could have said, ‘Mitt, drop to your knees.’ He would have dropped to his knees.”
And while this Trump tweet doesn’t include a petulant refusal of an imaginary request, somehow it still seems relevant:
“Always remember that as your success grows, you will be asked for more favors. Learn how to say ‘No.’ It is critical.”