Sorry, God. Donald Trump is just not that into you
Take a look at this video of Donald Trump at the Western Wall today:
Check out his body language. He looks like a 7-year-old boy being forced to shop for school pants on the Fourth of July. Every leaden expression, every shuffling, phlegmatic step fairly screams, "How long do I have to stand here with my pussy-grabbing hand stuck on this stupid wall?"
When he inserts his note into the wall* he looks like a clinically depressed park bear going through the motions of stealing honey.
This is not the look of a man who feels like he's in the true presence of God. He looks more like a guy who's trapped at his wife's aunt's funeral while his buddies watch the NFL playoffs at Buffalo Wild Wings.
This makes it all the more extraordinary that Trump was able to con millions of evangelical Christians into thinking he was a reverent man. After all, this is the same guy who nearly put money in a communion plate at an Iowa church and once said, "When I drink my little wine — which is about the only wine I drink — and have my little cracker, I guess that is a form of asking for forgiveness."
And here was his answer when asked if he had ever actually asked God for forgiveness (the forgiveness of sins through Christ's eternal sacrifice is, of course, the cornerstone of Christian faith, without which all hope in salvation is lost. Duh.):
"I am not sure I have. I just go on and try to do a better job from there. I don't think so. I think if I do something wrong, I think, I just try and make it right. I don't bring God into that picture. I don't."
Somehow that convinced devout Christians because, you know, the only way his answer could have conceivably been worse is if he'd said, "I light two votive candles per dead hooker."
*Update: 1001 Reasons has obtained an exclusive copy of Trump's Wailing Wall note: