Oh, my Christ. This photo.
Oh, my god, oh my god, oh my god, look at this shit.
That's either a photo of Donald J. Trump throwing out the first pitch at a baseball game or a young Rip Taylor trying out for the Robert Redford role in The Natural. If this is anything like Trump's orgasm face, someone please send a SEAL team to chopper Melania out of Trump Tower ASAP.
Much was made of the fact that Trump refused to throw out the first pitch to kick off the Major League season, but holy Christ, this explains everything. The last thing we need is Abner Doublechin singlehandedly destroying another great American institution.